Please, No Eating, Drinking, Smoking, or Flash Photography

Amazing how time flies. X turned three last Thursday. The Mrs. and I started a tradition last year where we take him to Disney for his birthday. We stay four days and play it up like tourists! and we really have a great time doing it. We attended several character breakfasts and spent time visiting the characters around the park and taking pictures. X was so excited he could hardly contain himself. It is so much fun to see his reactions when he sees characters he likes.

There were times though when I found myself becoming one of those parents... the ones who become so obsessed with their child's behavior that they loose any sense of proportion. I mean that it is a balancing act between making sure that your child behaves appropriately, and making sure he still has a good time. After all, we are there for the kids, right. If you become so rigid that the child has to stand right next to you every second, and can't get a little figity, no one is going to have a good time. When the Mrs. and I relaxed a bit, so did X and we were all much happier.

Then there were the miserable people. The people who had no business at the happiest place on Earth. The lady who stuck her arms up in the air as if she were under arrest, turning around like some stupid ballerina, showing she had nothing as she went through the line where they check your bags. Come on lady, a small inconvenience to try and make sure no one brings a bomb into the park. Grow Up!

There was the trip to Guest Relations. Everyone in that line was
M A D. I was too, not at Disney, but at the Mrs. I'd been telling her for two weeks we need to renew our passes. Someone told her on the phone that we had 30 days to do this, but the day after they expired we couldn't get into to the park. Off to Guest Relations. One couple at the window wanted their entire vacation refunded because there was a storm one day while they were at the park. I didn't realize that Disney could control the weather too!

This brings me to the line jumpers. "I waited in line already". BIG FAT FUCKING DEAL. If there is a line, you need to wait in it. One guy interrupted someone else's transaction. HOW FUCKING RUDE. When I told him he should wait in line just like everyone else, he told me that I would do the same if I were him. Hello Jackass, I've waited in several lines already today and you don't see me cutting in front of all these people.

But my favorite was this lady, who completely ignored the prohibition against flash photography. All through Pirates of the Caribbean, she is snapping pictures, setting off her flash and messing up the experience for everyone else. Not only is the flash going off, but the light from the display on her camera is distracting. So to show her how she made the experience for everyone else, I started snapping pictures of her. At least I turned my display off so that light didn't get in anyone's eyes. The Mrs. did remind me that I was breaking the rules as well and that two wrongs don't make a right, so I waited until we got off the ride to snap this one, her running from me. She must have heard me tell the Mrs. that I was gonna post her fat ass on the Internet so the world can see who the asshole was. I hope your pictures sucked. Oh yeah, remember this when your three kids are always in trouble too, you set the example, showing that it is optional to follow the rules. STUPID BITCH.

All in all, a good time was had by all. Disney is just great fun and I can't imagine getting tired of going there. At least I'm a happy person and can just laugh at these idiots - and heckle the line jumpers so that even if they don't step to the end, they will be somewhat embarrassed.